Bad Music is Good for You

Given the choice between an album by electro metal-core act The Bunny The Bear and any 90’s era Rush record, I’d rather listen to the former every day of the week. No; I haven’t lost my mind. Bad music often has considerable entertainment value. But average music? Not so much.

It’s why discerning audiences would rather watch Space Balls than your run-of-the-mill, monthly spy thriller. Sure, the production values may be top-of-the-line and the explosions might be kind of cool, but if we’re honest with ourselves, we’ve all been there before so many times that we could tell the story before it begins.. I can promise you one thing: you’ve never been to The Bunny the Bear before.

Let’s take a look at The Bunny The Bear’s “In Like Flynn.” A basic, stomping dance beat punctuates juvenile screams and auto-tuned wailing as synthesizers swell with faux-dramatism. That’s not even looking at the video, wherein a girl rips off her own arm and lovingly sticks it on a tree as bear and rabbit puppets dance in stringed spasms. Does this sound awful? It is, but it’s also hilarious.

Try finding something that entertaining in a 90’s Rush album. Spoiler alert: you’re not going to. I’m not picking on Rush here, because there’s an unlimited number of bands I could toss into the fray here. 80’s Genesis. 90’s Metallica. 00’s Snoop Dogg. These artists have one crippling flaw in common in their respective time periods: excruciating boredom.

There’s a reason you typically don’t hear people singing the praises of Load and Reload, arguably Metallica’s low-point. Those songs somehow make a Rick Ross album premiere seem uneventful. Part of this is surely expectation. After all, no one listens to Metallica for a fine country tune, but is that all it is? No. The songs really are unbearably dull. I certainly don’t think of this when I think of Metallica:

Yikes. Thankfully, I’ve got plenty of irredeemable garbage to cleanse the palette. I’ll take a fair dose of horrendous hilarity over an unimaginative slog any day of the week. Brokencyde? Any time.

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